January 3, 1993 – death on your mind

America has no human qualities anymore. She is a machine. She is a [illegible due to me dripping water on this recently].

See if you can figure it out


It doesn’t seem that technology is making the world smaller. On the contrary, everyone seems to have immense spaces between them. No one can completely trust one another as strangers anymore…You can’t walk down the street in the evening among people you’ve never met before. Unless you carry a weapon.

I’m not sure where this is coming from. I did not live in a particularly dangerous place. We did go outside our homes, and no one I knew carried a weapon. This is what I imagine half of America thinks it’s like living in a city, though. When in reality, all those strangers passing by and those loud club kids on the subway at 2AM just end up making you feel safer.

Therefore you have death on your mind and how can you enjoy that?

People find a way.

Another interesting metaphor for life is life being a broad open field. Society puts up walls like a labyrinth…Instead of getting somewhere by the shortest way possible, by a straight line, we’re all forced to to wander aimlessly and around things until we eventually come out and die.

Christmas break is almost over, guys.

This metaphor is not a very good one, but it does explain the fact that I feel like I’m walking blindly and obstinately into walls. I’m stubborn, I know, but I’m going to have to refuse to change my opinions.


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